A BROKEN HEART

I have written about our furry family many times on this blog. Last night we lost our beloved Duffy. As you may remember about a month ago he had a bad episode but seemed to recover. Monday was our son's birthday. As always Duffy joined in with the celebration, he was our son's best friend. He was like a puppy going up stairs with Zach and cuddling all night. Just before Zach and his family went home we had let Duffy out. My husband found him just standing in the yard and had to bring him in with his collar. Yesterday he had the same symptoms as a month ago but not as bad. He had dry heaves. I held him and rubbed his back and told him everything would be okay. He finally stopped the dry heaves and wanted to lie down in his mudroom with his Penny. He slept. We checked him and he was sleeping soundly. As it got dark our power went out. We lit candles and put some in the mudroom too. He looked at us and went back to sleep. The power came on 2 hours later and when we went to see him he was gone. My heart is breaking. I knew that it would happen one day but I do not think you are ever ready. Over the years we have had 10 dogs, 2 and 3 at a time. Duffy was with us the longest, probably because he was not a purebread. We have had Duffy for 13 years and Penny for 9. Both were adopted and around two or three so Duffy was almost fifteen. It still hurts as much as if we had lost him 10 years ago.

Penny is already lost without him, we all are. He was a lovely, happy dog. From the day we got him he adored our son. Zach was 18 and just starting college and they were inseperable. Zach is coming home today and we are laying our lovely boy to rest on our farm.

Duffy was our gentle giant. He was such a big dog but we trusted him even with little Luca. They became best friends and Luca would come running when he heard Duffy come in the house. We were hoping that Duffy would be here for a little granddaughter this summer so she would have a good first dog to love her and protect her.

Christmas will be especially difficult this year. Duffy came in on Christmas morning and loved to sit with us and the cats. He was my Christmas clown. I could put anything on him and he would sit for a picture. I will miss that so much.

Duffy was always happy. He was always glad to see us and knew where we were at all times. If my husband went to the neighbours, Duffy would sit and watch and not move until he returned. That is my profile picture and it always will be.

We have always had two sometimes three dogs at a time. I have always felt every creature needs a companion so that was what we did. Everytime we lost a furry family member we would bring another one into our lives quite soon after. I do not know this time. It hurts so much losing him, and Penny only ever got along with him, that I do not know if I can do this again. I may change my mind but right now the pain is too deep. All of you who have furry families, and I know there are many of you, understand how much this hurts. A little piece of my heart is taken away with every loss, I do not know how much more I have left. I am going to spend even more time with Penny. She is losing her eyesight and Duffy was her eyes. He was losing his hearing and she would bark loudly for him to come to her. They were the perfect pair.

We will miss him so much like all dogs he never asked for anything but love and we gave that to him three fold. My life became better because of this lovable, sweet boy who picked us out at the animal shelter to be his family. I will be forever grateful for that unconditional love and bond we all had with him but especially for the love and happiness he gave our son. Sleep well my love.